Tales of a Shrink

Christmas is over, thankfully. Not that I didn't have fun, but there is a limit to the amount of merry-making that I can tolerate.

Lots of amusing, blog-worthy things happened while I was out, but I'm very tired this morning and I don't feel like posting much. So I'm going to recap what happened quickly, for posterity's sake.

Christmas Eve was spent with Jason's immediate family. A good time was had by all, particularly since Jay's brother-in-law had a bottle of gin completely dedicated to Jason and myself.

Christmas day, I cooked like a mad man and had my family over for dinner. The highlight of the evening was discussing porno films with my mother, who was on her fourth Kahlua and cream by that time. I am not joking.

The day after Christmas (Boxing Day), Jay and I drove to Adrian (a little town about half-way to Ohio) to see his mother's family. I had not met all of his cousins until this point in our relationship. And now, I can safely say that I'm OK never seeing them again. It's not that they were overtly rude (although some of them were), it's more that I dislike large crowds. I found myself weighing the enjoyment that comes from making everyone else in the room uncomfortable, and my dislike for large family gatherings in which I am the Unwelcome Sodomite. There were actually moments during which I could hear people whispering to one another, "How are we going to explain this to the children?" and "It's a good thing Grandma isn't alive to see this." I must admit, this filled me with a wicked sort of glee. (Note: For an equally snarky post about my family, go here.)

Looking to the future, Jay's cousin is getting married on New Year's Eve, for some stupid reason. (Note for clarity: I understand why they are getting married; I don't understand why they chose to inflict their Heterosexual Privilege Ceremony on the rest of the family on the biggest party night of the year.) We are going to the ceremony, but not the reception, which seems like a good compromise. (Jay's brother-in-law asked me why we had decided not to attend the reception. I had a few drinks in me, and replied honestly: "Because we have better plans." He laughed and nodded, which means, in the shared language of in-laws, "I envy you." )