Tales of a Shrink

Monday, September 19, 2005

I declare tomorrow "Swear Like a Sailor Day."

Today, I feel like crap. Sore throat, aches and pains... the works. I want to go home and crawl into my bed and pull the cats under the covers with me. I want to eat Campbell's soup and drink tea.

Oy.

In honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day, I'm encourging ye all to haul yer ass over to the AIDS Walk Detroit Website and donate some booty. Aarr.

Five Pick-up lines used by Pirates

5) I got two wooden limbs now that I see you, me beauty! Yar!

4) Ahoy, me pretty--it ain't your deck I be wanting to swab.

3) Would ye like to see me Jolly Roger? By which I mean, of course, me flag consisting of a skull an' crossbones in a field o' solid black. And then, perhaps, might ye suck me off?

2) You know, me pretty, they can cure syphilis these days.

1) Yar... so you be the new cabin boy?

9:08 AM

Narcissist, table for one?

Our Hero

I see you're experiencing transference.

Tell me about your mother.

Come, sit on the couch.

There is the small matter of my fee...

Trivia!

You can find this site by Googling "Uninteresting urethra excerpts." Now that's hot.

Consumption

Poem of the Day:

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Remember what Sartre said about other people?

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