Tales of a Shrink

First, I want to point out that I my friend Fur ("Jennifer" to the mundanes) reads my blog. I'm amazed, because I haven't heard from Fur in a couple of years, and then suddenly I get a comment from her. Welcome, Fur! It's good to see you! And, if you wouldn't mind, could you send me an e-mail with your contact information?

Now on to the business at hand. Here's a Monday morning meme because I'm too tired to do anything of substance.

Sevens

Seven things you plan to do before you die:

1) Visit India
2) Adopt children
3) Become a doctor of something
4) Publish a book
5) Retire
6) Lose 40 50 pounds
7) Live in a small town

Seven things you can do:

1) A really good impersonation of Sean Connery
2) Touch my tounge to my nose--hot!
3) Cross my eyes
4) Make a cheese souffle
5) Name all 50 states in alphabetical order
6) Drive a stick shift
7) Find a parking space anywhere, anytime--Honestly I can. If there is parking, I will find it.

Seven things you can NOT do:

1) Sing--When I try to sing, milk goes bad and flowers wilt.
2) Whistle--I've never been able to figure it out.
3) Ride in any vehicle without getting motion sick
4) Dive into a pool without doing a belly-flop
5) Tie a bow tie--And I've always wanted to learn.
6) Get lost
7) Touch a centipede and not freak out

Seven things that attract you to the ~~opposite~~ same sex:

1) Nice eyes--Preferably blue or green, and I like guys with large, puppy dog eyes.
2) Big arms--I'm a sucker for muscles.
3) Broad shoulders
4) Height--I like men who are really, really tall--like 6'4" and up.
5) Sense of humor
6) Short hair--I hate it when guys have long hair. Yuck.
7) Deep voices

Seven things you say most:

1) "Dude." I find it's a nice, universal way to address people.
2) "Every good deed has it's own punishment."
3) "Never eat more than you can lift."
4) "Learn something new every day."
5) "For the love of fuck." This should probably be number one on the list.
6) "Rage!" Usually I shake my fist for effect when I say this.
7) "Just for shits and giggles..."

Seven Celebrity Crushes:

1) Can I put Vin Diesel for all seven? No? OK, fine...
2) Tom Welling
3) Randy Orton
4) Tommy Rowlands
5) Landon Lueck
6) Jason Gould (Yes, it's because of his parents. Sue me.)
6) Eric Himan
7) Seann William Scott